Dance Diary | 2nd Midweek Ballet Class

Surprise a 2nd midweek dance diary! My classes got canceled because of a massive power outage on campus leaving us no choice to cancel. So with that good news I decided to go to the 7pm ballet class. I can't go on Wednesdays or Fridays because my class usually ends at 6 and the studio I go to is an hour away from campus and 2 hours away from where I live so when I get a chance to go to a ballet class I jump for it!

I went to class in the morning and nearly died from the heat and when they canceled I rushed home to rest and get dressed. I left the house at quarter to 2 and then got there before 4. And since I had so many hours left I went up to the Cutural Center's library to do some reserch about my thesis topic. there were so many books their about the arts and I struck gold because I found a book that was exactly what I was looing for and was so happy. I stayed there until 5 and then headed towards the basement to the studios.

In my 2 hour waiting I read the book I am currently reading which was Becca Fitzatrick's Finale. I didnt fisnish it because I decided to do some strecthing. The hallways on a weekday are quieter and no kids running around and thelights were semi-off so it was dark and a little scary I do admit I was a little scared.

Now for the class, I didn't have the same classmates as I did on Saturdays but I did see only 1 familar face and we got to share a barre together. The rest of the girls were maybe a little younger and then there were some that were much older which i guess was a relief. I did feel a little nervous and shy but as soon as the cass started it melted away.

The teacher was not my regular teacher nor was it the teacher I had last tie I took class on Wednesday so I felt a little intimidated because it was another company member and if you remember the last time the company member was the teacher it was far to fast and not like I was used to. But good news, I loved her and class! It was amazing and I cannot describe how fun and how much I enjoyed the class1

So we did barre excersises and they werent those simple ones we do on Saturday lasses. This company member did some new steps and made it a little difficult but I loved the challenge and pushing myeself in my regular cass it's like the teacher treats us like we are new and do the same step that is like it is for kids. This class was just so rejuvanating and made me do things I didnt do before.

We did the standard plies and tendus but we did extras with it and we even did some arabesque excersises and she lifted my leg higher than ever and straightened my upper body and for a split second when i looked in the mirror I saw myself do an arbasque nd it looked lovely. That was my first time doing it and it ade me feel lovely. we did splits and I still can't get it but I almost do. We did some piques and more balancing and I am still practicing my balance and I cracked both my ankles good so I am giving them a rest but they didn't hurt that much after.

After barre we did center and this was one of my favorite parts in class. We did some pirouette exercises and the lead up to the actually turning and then we actually did pirouettes. And guess what, I did one flawlessly and spotted and everything. It was perfect but after that I couldn't get one anymore but i was so happy. I need to work on it but I am getting there and I can see so much improvement in my dancing then when I first started so yay for progress! We did more center work and I was doing the leaps freely and at first I was embrassed like I said but now I just go with it and smile and have fun.

Now during across the room was by far my favorite part of the class. I know I love it in the first place but we dd staeps I used to love during which made it more special. We started off ith glissade and jetes and did a round of those. The next was tenleves. i love those so much and I really gave my effort to perfect those and relly getting up and jumping high and perfecting the arms nd head. I do this move at my house and use it to transport myelf in the halls. Instead of skipping you can see me doing this step through long hllways or across my room. I love this step so much so doing it in class really made it for me. And then we did turns, first pique and then regular ones across the first corner. When she demonstarted it she made it look so effortless and so flawless. I had them before but doing them again was kind of new so I stumbled my balance but I got a good set in. So I know next time what to practice and try to get better at. For the warm down we did some middle spits and side strecthes and I am afr from laying on the floor to be flat. It was a great session and I wish I could do that class again every day.

So I know this is long and I'm sorry for ballbing on but clss just made me so happy today I had to share every detail about it. I know I shouldnt compare but she was an amzing teacher because she did steps that were the level we were at and she didnt forget to correct the students. If I see her in the hall I will defiently thank her and would tell her she defiently deserves that spot in the company because she diefinetly made my day and even if i got home left and feeling so tired I am still grateful of doing it.

I hope to see you on Saturday's dance diary! No other posts are going up this wee but I can try if I have time.

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Dance Diary | 12th Week of Ballet

Hi everyone and welcome to my 12th week of ballet class! Sorry this is a little late but my faithful laptop died Sunday night and wouldn't turn on anymore. I took it to my dad's but it couldn't be fixed. So, if you are wondering how I am writing this blog post well, I got new laptop! It is so pretty and it is hot pink! I thought I would update because it is just so lovely.

As for dance everything was fine this week. I had a morning class which wasn't all exciting but since not having an 8am college class for a while it was kind of straining and I really felt tired right before my 3pm ballet class. I've gone 3 weeks without having to go to my media class but now that I am starting again it is really taking my energy. Besides that I am pretty much fine the whole day.

In class I got the same spot as last week and we did the same exercises we did last week so not much to update with. We did get to have a few minute talk with our dance teacher to help motivate us and do some explaining which was I guess nice. Having talks like that really do help and encourage me a lot more.

The only thing we did different this week was pirouette practice. We are preparing ourselves to do some pirouettes and all I could think was finally! This is what I've been looking for! We are doing some practices to straighten ourselves even more so that is good. My only problem is my balance. I am doing badly with that and am falling to quickly. That is the number one thing I am going to work on from now on so I can see some improvements. Our teacher says by December we should have our pirouettes so yay! First we did them t the barre nd then in the center. We aren't really turning just yet just half way to familiarize. I guess I like that we are going slow and just getting into it which is great.

We didn't do any floor exercises or stretches this week which I a kind of happy about so I won't be sore all this week like last week and we didn't do across the room because we did some much barre and center doing turning exercises. Other than that, that's what we did!

Sorry this had to be a little shorter than normal but I really need to finish my thesis and I just snuck in a quick post to satisfy me. Again, see you next dance diary update!


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How I Balance College and Ballet?

So how do I balance being a full time college student and being a ballerina? Well that's a good question and the answer is I just learn to deal with it as it comes and take as much I can handle.

Since I just finished midterm week I thought I would share and maybe give a few tips that I do to help me balance my busy schedule. 

I am in my last year of college majoring in communication and media studies so I have a lot going on between my thesis (which is about ballet too if can't tell I'm obsessed with it) my major subjects which are production classes like news production, media ethics and new media. I also have the last basic subjects I'm required to take like french, history and my least favorite economics. My schedule is pretty good I did have a professor mess up and now I am stuck with one of my classes which was supposed to be on a Wednesday but was moved which interferes with ballet. I'll get into that in a minute. So I have Monday off which is a blessing because I hate Mondays. On Tuesdays I only have two classes which is an hour enough each so I get to go home early! But I hate Wednesdays and Fridays which is also a day they offer my level ballet class but I can't attend because I have classes from &:30 in the morning. Yes in the morning so I have to force myself out of bed at such an early hour. So I have 2 morning classes, lunch and after that a 3 hour class and then another one and a half hour class that will end at 6. I do have a 4 hour break though for lunch so that is okay and I can handle it. Fridays are supposed to be enjoyed and but I hate Fridays. I have my 7:30 class again and then another class till 10:30 and from there I dont have another class 'till 4:30 in the afternoon. I have 6 hours of doing nothing so I go to my aunt's house and pretty much stay there since it is close to campus instead of driving an hour home and then fighting the traffic going back and then going home again. It does have its perks because I can do homework, go to the mall since its close and more importunately catch up on my sleep. My aunt lets me sleep in the spare if I'm lucky my 2 year old niece doesn't wake me.So that is pretty much my weekly course scdule that is defienelty a pain especially when you know it is almost over.

So about that professor, I have a long break because I was supposed to have a class but the professor moved it to Saturday and I picked a afternoon class because I have my Saturdays full because of my internship and ballet so I had an ordeal of this but I got it sorted after going to our department chair and clearing it. My tip if you having an interfering schedule is just stay calm and try to deal with and if you need help don't be afraid to ask. I got it sorted and now I am not that worried about failing that class.

I don't technically work yet but I do have an internship that I am finishing up this year at the dance company I'm taking ballet at so it all works out I guess. I started in the summer and need to finish 400 hours as a requirement to graduate. I was supposed to be done with this but I got sick and had tonsillitis which I almost had to have surgery for. The doctor put me on a 3 week rest so that lost me hours which I couldn't get done. Now I am making up for it and they don't mind me there since it gives them help. I really want to work there when I graduate because dance is what I wanted to be my career anyways. So every Saturday I get in about 5-8 hours it depends on what time I get in after class and then how long I stay. My ballet class is counted so I get an hour after that. Right now I have about 150 hours left to complete.

Do I have a social life? Kind of. I don't go out with friends that much because I either am doing my work or I'm at dance but I do make time if I have to especially since we have such a long break in between classes.I'm not the kind of person who goes out much though. I love being at home cuddled in bed with my laptop or a good book so if I do have time I'll either be on my laptop or reading those are the two things I can't live without.

My Tips |

1. Stay calm if you are in a stressful situation

This will help because in the end it will work out if you let it.

2. Prioritize things you think are more important

If dance is more important than something that day then go ahead.

3. Stay organized and keep in mind time management

I have my iPhone to help me organize my schedule or a diary/agenda could help. I'm really good with managing my time so work on that if you have to.

4. Do school work in your spare time

I have a long break so I sneak in my assignments there so I don't have to worry about them when I get home.

5. Find time for personal activities

With everything going on everyone needs a break so find something you enjoy.

6. Try not to procrastinate

I know I am kind of guilty of this but it rmember to get it done so you have time for dance.

7. Get some help if you feel like you need it

Don't be that person who swamps themselves, if you need a hand don't be afraid to ask a friend or a family member.

8. Don't freak out over little things

Another thing I do way too often but I am learning that I don't have to be.

9. Set a goal and aim to accomplish it

Set up a set of goals for that week so you can get it all done and feel better about it.

10. Reward yourself once in a while

If you want something you've been eying then go for it we deserve something for our hard work!

So it is just a balancing act. Just like ballet you have to balance and to be able to go en pointe and right now my life is just like that. I hope you enjoyed getting a little glimpse of my personal life and the tips I shared. I hope I helped a little and you can do it to!

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Dance Diary | 11th Week of Ballet

Hi and welcome again to my 11th week dance diary! I can't believe I have been doing this for more or less than 11 weeks! That is a lot and I will probably being saying this in the next coming weeks too so I guess time can just fly.

This week I actually got to dance unlike last week and I can tell I really missed it! It was nice getting last week off and just watching the performance of Giselle but I still wanted to dance myself. So coming in this week I promised myself I would work hard and not be so easy like I have been in the previous weeks. I wanted to make an effort and not be shy to ask and see if I am doing things correctly.

I actually did more stretching this week before class. I usually just stretch a little and then wait until class to really warm up but this makes things easier. I can really feel I am getting flexible again and thank goodness for that. I can really feel a difference in general so this makes me happy that I am getting closer to losing weight and going en pointe soon! I did a few lounges in the hall and tried touching my toes for about a minute and then repeating and it did really help.

In class, I was going for my regular spot but the teacher moved me to the front barre and right in the center so technically I was front and center in front of the mirror and thought it was so weird to be there but I think seeing myself up close like that has made me more aware of myself to correct and see what I'm doing. I usually am a few rows away from the mirror so I can't see myself that much but now I'm right there. It is a little intimidating because I am a little overweight and I can see my body much more but the leotard is my best friend and it hides everything so well and I don't feel as large and I'm thrilled about that. So as I'm there the teacher demonstrates right beside me and I get more of an up close look to see what the steps are.

I did get corrections today and since some of the major dancers weren't in class the teacher is focusing on us again. I guess since the performance is over we can go back to normal. I shouldn't be happy I got corrections right but since I know it can help me and since I haven't gotten corrections in a while I guess that is good. I did get my tendu really stretched and she really made me pointed and that made me hurt my thighs and so did the plies but I pushed and worked every muscle as much as I could. Before I held back a little because I was scared I could hurt myself but now I am getting comfortable and trusting my body more and I am testing how far I can go without hurting myself that is and I think it is working.

Barre was fine and we aren't doing the same routines every week which is good so we do various steps that we don't get tired of. I am memorizing it in my head but sometimes I cannot get my body to do it. I am starting to get everything back and my body has learned now too but sometimes my brain and body just don't want to listen and it gets frustrating because right after we do it I can do it perfectly but while we are doing it with music I just lose it. I did notice when we do it on the left side I am better and can really just perfect it but on the right it just looks blah. I hope I can fix it soon. Also I have noticed that the teacher was right and holding your core really helps my balance and this week she has referred to it as "not spilling the soup" if we keep our cores nice and strong then we can hold up and it is making a difference.

As for any injuries none so far. My ankle isn't hurting that much when I go up on releve anymore and it just cracks but it isn't like the last two weeks. I guess since I had a rest and wasn't on it that much because of school being canceled all week and me just cuddled in bed it really gave it time to heal. I can go higher in demi-pointe now that it doesn't hurt and i can hold my balance better than I did in the beginning.

After barre we did some split stretches which I needed and I can feel my splits coming back and I am so close to it! I thought I was supposed to point my toes in splits because last time I had them flexed and the teacher corrected me to always point my toes not matter what because that is the trademark of a ballerina so I can almost point my toe so  it can reach the floor but she came over to flex it and that is when I felt the stretch. I knew something was wrong when I thought it was too easy and I really felt it once i got my foot stretched out. I am better in the back and I really want to practice that stretch at home now but I am still a little afraid I will hurt myself. I am just going to ease towards it. I still can't get up without using my hands and stand in an arabesque. I am heavy so I need some support but I am getting better and just using my knees to get up instead of my hands so I guess yay for improvement. The teacher doesn't say anything because I know she can't push my limits and I'm glad she doesn't.

We did some center but we don't do it that long since we spend almost the whole hour at the barre. We did a few port a bras and then we did across the room which is my favorite but we could only do one step. I wish we did turns still but we are slowly getting there I think. I hope i can do some turns soon because I really want to. The last thing we did was balanche in the center which is my favorite step and then we hold a pose. Since I have mastered it and knew it since I was little I think that is what makes it my favorite.

That is what I did in ballet. A little long and a lot of details I hope. I took notes after class so I can add them to this dance diary and I think I will be doing it so I can remember to add some more points. I hope I get to be in the December recital because we are doing Cinderella and I really want to join. I am literally counting the days. I almost forgot this week's picture is my turnout. I just got done with class and put my legwarmers on and thought I would take a picture since I haven't been posting pictures for my dance diary lately. I probably need to work on my turnout more but there it is.

I think that is enough for today. I hope you enjoy this weeks dance diary and can't wait for next weeks!

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Throwback Thursday | Rockin Robin

My first Throwback Thursday!

I found a recital CD from 10 years ago! Can you believe it has been 10 years!? That means this was taken in 2003! How time flies. So I decided to do screen shots of one dance in particular and maybe do some more in the upcoming weeks of the show because I did a lot of dances during this particular show. It is kind of nostalgic watching it and I definitely miss it.

This by far was my favorite from that show. The theme was Color Me Dancing and it was all about color if you couldn't guess. The dance was called Rockin' Robin and we danced to of course Rockin' Robin by Bobby Day.

I love the costume and I was getting tickled by the feathers all through the dance but you can't really tell. The skirt was just strings like the Hollywood version kind of thing. I loved the head piece the most and I remember begging my mom if I could wear it to school but she said no but I really loved the head pieces at the time.

This was a tap number and I loved the tap numbers the most. I also just realized that whenever I did tap I was always front and center. I did not know that before but watching my tap dances I was always put in the front and I was very tall for my age which you'd think they would put me in the back. It makes me proud to think that they thought I was a great tap dancer and to be given that honor makes me so happy. That is why I loved tap maybe because I had such passion for it.

And since I did that 'I Miss Tap Dancing' last Tuesday I thought this would be perfect to show off after doing that blog post because of how much I miss it!

I hope you liked my throwback. I can't wait to do more! If you want to see a studio picture of the costume I put one on my dance history post.

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Where to find me?

Just wanted to do a post on where you can find me on the internet! I have pretty much every social media platform so I thought I would share them with you!

Email
If you'd like to contact me for any reason. I love any email I get and it is always open for anything!

Twitter
I love checking twitter and mostly tweet about dance and my personal life so if you want a sneak peek in what I do than go follow!

Facebook
This blog has its own facebook page so if you would like to like it go right ahead. I mostly just update it with the latest posts!

Tumblr
I Have a dance tumblr dedicated to only dance! If you would like to follow please do, I am obsessed with this site and post ballet and dance pictures everyday!

Instagram
This is my dance instagram. I will hopefully start putting more pictures of me dancing on their once I get to class again. I also put some pretty images I found on tumblr s go ahead and follow!

Blog
I also have a fashion, beauty and lifestyle blog! I took a break for a while there to focous on this blog but I will be back with more posts soon!

I have all my links on the side so if you like you can access it there. I hope you like it and tomorrows post is really exciting for me so I hope you're looking forward to it like I am!

xo

Jackie

I Miss Tap Dancing!

So I wanted to write this because since I started doing ballet I kind started to miss tap. I mean I was more of a tap dancer than a ballerina so when I'm in class I forget that it is ballet and my feet kind of just tap. Does that make sense? I know that some of the moves can be similer but I end up tapping it and I am so glad my teacher doesn't notice.

In my last dance diary. I said I brought my tap shoes to the studio to do some tap exercises and I loved it. The studio I go to doesn't offer a tap class and so this was new to them to see. There is only one studio I know of in my country that offers a tap class and it is across town from where I dance at now. The studio is pretty far and since I live in the country area the city is pretty far from me and both the dance studios would be a 2 hour drive for me if there is no traffic and there is always traffic. I'm still debating when after I graduate if I want to go and take a tap class. I sacrifice my Saturday's to go to my current studio already and if I went to both that would be a problem as for commuting there. It is just a thought for now though.

I was in the zone and the people just starred at me in awe. I liked it a little but it was kind of strange like I was doing something wrong. But tapping again was so thrilling. I enjoyed it so much and I felt special that I have this talent and can do it. Since it is rare for others to see I thought it was nice for them to experience it isn't common dance around here so that made me feel like I was the only one who could do it.

When I saw this on tumblr, my heart broke. I mean I am starting to see that tap isn't as popular as it was and it is sad because it is a beautiful art form just like ballet. My dream since I was a little girl was to become a dancer teacher. I know some girls dream to be a professional dancer or even a prima ballerina but mine was simple. I wanted to own my own dance studio and teach ballet and tap. I hope one day I could teach tap and get this dance more popular again. It would be nice to see more tap dancing and it wouldn't fade away.

I hope you liked my tap talk! I really miss it and I am trying my best to do as much. Maybe on the weekends I can start up my old tap routines and do them again but maybe without tap shoes since the neighbors might go crazy if I start tapping in my apartment. Well I'll see you in my next blog post!

xo
Jackie

Dance Diary | 10th Week of Ballet

So, I didn't get to dance this week because the company had it's first show and we got to watch for free. The students all went because who will teach classes when the dance teachers are either part of the show are are working for it.

I was disappointed because I really wanted to do ballet because it feels like I haven't danced in forever. I am so waiting for our three week break from school so I could have dance 3 days a week and not spend my week waiting to dance.

I will write a review for the ballet I watched. The company restaged Giselle and was really good. I got to sell soviner programs and posters and all that fun stuff in the lobby before and after so that was fun.

I hope this Wednesday  can take a class but I doubt it because it is a holiday here so they might be closed but I am crossing my fingers they aren't. So if they are open look forward to a post this Wednesday! If not then I have some interesting blog post this week and even some cool pictures too coming out!

xo
Jackie

Dance Diary | 9th Week of Ballet

And today is my 9th week of dancing! How fast has it been? I can't really believe how time just goes by. Now what did I do this week?

I tried not letting last week get to me so I went in after my college class with my mom this time because she wanted to see me dance again I guess. She probably misses taking me to dance and still thinks I'm that little girl she always drove wearing a tutu and lugging around all those dance shoes. I hate to admit it but I missed how she sat there for hours waiting for me while I danced. It just feels so nostalgic and even though I'm just 20 she probably thinks I'm so grown up going to classes by myself now.

I did have to work a little because I had my classmate from college come by so we could work on our thesis. I thought I would have time but she came so late and I was going to be late for class. We are doing our thesis about ballet and so we had to observe the comapny class and since it was almost going to start when she arrived I was running up and down the hall with her in my ballet shoes to get the details sorted and it was just a mess but finally I had to push her to come into the studio so we could take pictures and get everything sorted and stuff like that.

The good news about all that was I got to dance a little with the company. A dream come true right? I was so excited and even though I was there for only 10 minutes so I could attend my regular class. It felt so professional and to me the best part was they had a piano guy! Yeah a real life guy playing the ballet music. I know it is such a small detail but I never had a class that had a guy play the music instead of a cassette. It was amazing and a highlight definitely.

So my expereince was that they were so trained and looked amazing. A lot of them didn't wear ballet shoes and they wore a lot of layers and they just looked so professional and just I really wanted to stay and do the class but I didn't want to disrupt. I would of put pictures but I can't because they are for my thesis and there is copyright issues so I couldn't but I do have some for my memories and to add to my scrapbook!

So after we got our pictures and videos I left to go to my regular class and another teacher took class with us but I don't really like her but I had to be at the barre with her and I was just ignoring her. She is young and has the body of a ballerina but doesn't dance there that much anymore. I won't get into why I don't like her but it was just weird having her there.

I also noticed I am not getting corrected anymore and I know that should be a good thing but the teacher is focusing on the other dancers like the ones who are majoring in dance and the ones who will be in the recital. The others like me who are there because it is a hobby aren't getting critique either. I know she should correct the others more but I would like to know if I should do anything better or have anything be done in a certain way. I am hoping it will be over when the recital is over and that will stop her favoritism. I also hope its normal when big shows are coming up but I was always in a class that was going to recital so we would all be prepped. I'll let you know next week if it is the same because if that is the case I would like to change studios if I'm not going to get any good dance training.

Well that was a long one this week! It makes up for my short ones the previous weeks! So as always see you next week!

xo  Jackie

Dance Diary | 8th Week of Ballet

And I'm here again with another Dance Diary! Well class was okay this week and I can say I've been a little sick but I am still there making it and I still took class. I noticce I was a little sore this week for some reason especially when I went on releve but I am trying not to force myself and I just want to take it easy.

I don't get to do the recital after all because I think it is supposed to be cast and I don't really fit in I guess. I don't understand the dance schools requirements and I'm a little bummed because I was so into it and was so excited but I guess it doesn't workout that way. I have been trying not to let it get me down but I still really wanted to dance on stage again. I was talking with my dad and I hate to admit I was upset because it might be my weight and I don't have that ballerina body but that is why I am there to try and lose some pounds and then work harder to get in shape. He told me stop thinking like that and not judge them right away because it might be cause I'm new and they don't want me to over do myself. I am trying to listen but I always have that thought in the back of my mind and I know therre might be some great over wieght ballerinas and that I shouldnt worry at all.

I just went home right away after class and I usually stay a while but I wasnt in the mood this week. I hope next week is better and I don't have to think and just dance because isnt dance supposed to get rid of your emtions and help you. I guess I'll just use dance to not think and just do what I love without their stupid opinion if they have one about me. I am still deciding though if after my internship if I should still dance with them if they won't treat me good. There are a few studios I could try and I might get better treatment as a dancer.

I think it's because they are a company and train company members there so they don't know how to deal with others. It is just an opinion but I hope it's true. Well I guess I'll be back again next week.

xo  Jackie

Dance Diary | 7th Week of Ballet

And here I am again with another dance diary. I didn't blog this week because I had so many things to do and my classes demanded so much of my time I couldn't spare a minute to do anything leisurely. I did treat myself though and took an hour break to watch the first episode of the 2nd season of Breaking Pointe. I miss the show and like all other dancers was so exicted for it to be picked up for another season.

Dance was good this week I guess. I mean I'm getting into routine and starting to not feel so dumb with the steps and can follow along without looking down as much. I am trying to train myself into looking straight ahead and at the mirror aswell.

I'm cutting it short this week so I hope you understand I should be doing my thesis instead of procrastinating. But this was a really fun distraction for me! 

xo  Jackie

Dance Diary | 6th Week of Ballet

So, if you didn't notice I didn't attend last Saturday's ballet class because of the storm we had. I had class in the morning and went to that and I was going to drive down to the studio but the rain was so harsh and the wind was just terrible and I knew I wouldn't be able to drive away from my campus and an hour and a half away from my house in that kind of storm so I had to miss it. I was so upset about this and really wanted to go to class. This was my first time missing it and I promised myself that no matter what I would go even if I was sick but I just couldn't drive through it and risk an accident or getting stranded in the city. I'm glad I took a class last Wednesday or I would have felt worse that I didn't take ballet that week. It was almost like a sign telling me to go to class on Wednesday.

This week though, I thought I would be a little behind and I feel like since I missed a week I would have trouble again and that my body will be sore. I did get used to it again though and it was like all the other times I did class.

We are still doing technique and improving. I am getting better in holding in my stomach and trying to remain nice and long. I think I'm doing okay and even if I'm not in class I am starting to form a habit of holding in everything and improving my posture. I felt like I slouched before but now I am slowly learning to elongate myself.

I'm not getting corrected as much like the other girls who are always getting yelled out for doing something wrong. But I did get corrected with my allonge. I always seem to flick my wrist and I was told that it is bad but I have been doing it that way ever since I was little so I need to train myself to stop flicking my wrist. I was furious with the teacher because I am not just a ballet dancer but also a tap dancer and I used to do it before to give it an effect when you dance so it is not so plain. I really had to think to stop getting my wrist to flick out when I do my routines. Other than that I am remembering to stand tall, point my toes and I am hoping with dear life that I can balance.

My big problem I seem to have is balancing when I am on my toes. I can do it but I think since I have so much weight in my that my toes are having a little hard time balancing all that weight. I can hear my ankles crack when I first go up in relleve but then I am fine and find my center. I just have to improve my balance and I will be fine.

I do have good news this week. We have a recital coming up! I thought it was going to be in December and there is one which will be a full production but this August our recital is going to be happening. They do it every quarter and so there is one in August, December and March. You cannot believe how excited I am and when I found out I was so thrilled and couldn't wait. I have something to look forward to know that is much closer. I was so excited for December and planning things but now I have a small recital to plan for. It is also an evaluation which I know I wont get promoted or anything but it is exciting. We don't have full costumes this time which is a little sad but I do get a skirt and we get to dance in the main theater which is great. I am planning on bringing my whole family because when I was in the US, it was only my mom and dad and now I can bring a whole army with me. I have an aunt who is actually considering to make me a banner and block peoples view and shout my name and give me a standing ovation before I even start. She is so sweet and is definitely my number one fan now and so is her daughter. She is two and loves to watch me perform so I can't wait for that.

Another good point is I got an I.D. Which is not a big deal but to me it was. I just kept on starring at it and as you can see it might not be fancy and made out of paper and laminated yet I love it so much. The picture is from way back in high school because that is all I had and I use that picture for pretty much anything. You'd think I would get another one done soon. I do love my drivers license picture which is rare cause you look awful but I look great in mine. I wish I could use that one instead though.

I hope you enjoyed my dance diary this week. I hope not to miss anymore but I will just have to see. And I also am so excited for recital day and I hope you guys are to since it will be my first time to perform on stage again after a long time.

xo 

Jackie

Meeting a National Ballerina!

Can you believe I met a famous ballerina!? I can't believe it either! In my last blog post I talked about going to the company's open rehearsal and one of the people who attended was the Philippines national ballerina, Lisa Makuja-Elizarde. She is famous for doing ballet here and it was a priledge for me to talk to her and actually meet her. My aunt was ecstatic as well and a little more of a fangirl than me.

She looked amazing and was so kind when I asked for a picture. She didn't turn me down and even asked how long I was dancing for. I couldn't believe I was talking to a real live famous ballerina. It's not everyday you meet someone like this. In my whole dancing experience I think I have only met a handful of famous dance people. I might have to do a blog post on the others I met sometime.

I kind of regret not wearing something more formal. As you can see I was in my leotard and tights with just sweatpants and a coverup. I think I even had legwarmers on but not really sure. But it did get me noticed and I think I was the only dance student form the school to watch the company event so it was okay I guess. I hope to get to meet her again because I would love to hear more about her career in person and what it was like going all over the world to perform these princpal parts.

I hope you enjoyed hearing about me meeting a famous ballerina. Have you ever met one? It is such a dream for an aspiring dancer to actually met someone you want to be just like.

xo
Jackie

Ballet Philippines's Open Rehersal "Zebra"

Last July 6, I was invited by the Artistic Director of the ballet company I work for to watch the open rehearsal of a new choreographed modern dance they will be performing next February. I was really interested and since this was a rare thing I decided to go. So after my ballet class which ended at 4 PM I waited 3 hours to watch this show. I took my 2 Aunts and my niece to the main theater. The dance studio is inside the theater so we didn't have to go far.

When we finally got the tickets we went inside. I was expecting to be seated in the actual seats but there was special seating right on the stage so we get a live and up close view of the dancers. I thought it was neat and a little more personal. It was a pretty nice event if I have to say but I felt a little underdressed. As more and more people came in they were wearing formal clothes while I was in my leotard and tights with only sweats and a t-shirt cover up. I know next time to wear more decent clothes.

The show started and my niece who is 2 almost 3 years old was making some noise and this is kind of late at night for her so I was getting annoyed because I didn't want to get embarrassed because she was the only kid there while the guests were mostly important people. She was pretty good but I still was trying to make her keep quiet. She enjoyed the dancing but when it came to the people who were speaking about the event she wouldn't listen. We were sitting in front of the 2nd cast who will perform on the next night of the actually performance, what was so cute was some of the company members were talking to her and werent annoyed at all. She then yelled that they were amazing when the show was over. So, one of the comapny members took her to meet the cast and she even got a picture with one of them. She even complimeted the principle dancer. She is 2 like I said and they all htough that was the cutest thing.

Enough about my little niece, my thoughts were it was a lovely event. The company introduced new projects and the upcoming performances by the company. The Executive Director also gave a nice speech about new things coming up and what to expect. She explained about the new studio that is in process to improve the quality and invite in more dancers. The Artistic Director introduced the choreographer and his work. This performance and event was technically dedicated to him because he is leaving to go back to France in a couple of days and probably wont see the show in February because he is a company member in France. I also forgot to mention he did a short piece himself and I would have to say it was well done. I love the style and how he really used his body and movements. He is such a great dancer and the piece he choreographed was amazing as well. It was very different and really captured what he was trying to portray in today's society.

I take this as a privileged to be apart and to attend the event. I met some important people and it is definitely a rare and unforgettable experience. 

Zebra is part of one of the dances Ballet Philippines will hold in February 2014 entitled "The Art of Dance" which will be apart of the 44th Season: IllumiNATION." Another performance they will be hosting is Giselle which will open August 16.

*Disclaimer: My thoughts of the event are my own and even though I am affiliated by working with the company this does not affect my thoughts or my opinion about the event. 
*Zebra Poster: Credit to BP's Website
*Picture: My own I took at the event.

xo
Jackie

Dance Diary | Midweek Ballet Class

Yay, a special midweek dance diary! So that means I went to a ballet class but not on a Saturday. I will still go to my Saturday class though. Yesterday I posted I might be taking a ballet class because I didn't have to attend any college courses that day so that gave me an opportunity to take a class.

I left my laptop at the office at my ballet studio so I couldn't write this 'till now. So, I did my internship duties during the day and afternoon like always.

My class started at 7 PM and I stopped working around 6 to get dress and to stretch. When I got all dressed I sat in the hallways with my other classmates and stretched with them. Some of them I knew their faces from seeing them in class on Saturdays. I started talking to one and found out some much about her. She was so nice and really inspiring. She is a mother of triplets and her daughter wanted to try ballet. She used to do ballet but stopped because she couldn't afford it anymore, now that she can she dances 3x a week while her daughter dances once. She was so friendly and I liked getting to know the other ballerinas. To me it was kind of strange having older girls in my ballet class but I know it's a semi- adult class so I shouldn't really be surprised. The other girls were my age or close and some of the boys were too.

When class finally began we had a lot more students than what I was used to. All the barres were full and my normal spot was gone which I was kind of sad about but I dealt with it but you get so used to a certain spot. Some of the dancers took our class even though they just got done with the class before us. I thought our regular teacher was going to teach us because I gotten so used to her even though sometimes I was a little annoyed with her since she teaches slow and always reminds us and corrects us. But boy this class was not what I was expecting.

Our teacher was a company member and you should know that company members think you know everything like them so the class is fast paced and there is no movement being corrected. You either do the combination or figure out a way to do it. She was shouting out commands without demonstrating first and I hardly remember them anymore and I was just guessing and copying and trying to do everything all correctly at the same time. You thought I was having trouble doing it all before well this time around I was about to lose it.

I did keep up but I was trying to correct my technique and keep up with the pace. I know now not to complain about my regular teacher because it is slow after taking this fast one. But I do have to admit it was a nice change. I think I should take a couple slow classes that focus on technique and then this kind of fast paced one.

During class though she made us do releves every combination and then end in passe on demi-pointe. I can hardly keep my balance doing a regular passe so I was very unstable plus our arms were supposed to be in fifth position so that made me even more wobbly. I tried to remember what the teacher said and suck everything in and just imaging yourself being pulled up and I did and it did help a little but since I am carrying so much weight my ankles started cracking and I would go down right away. Now I know I should practice those and get my ankles to be stronger so I can don more combinations on demi-pointe.

Since I am writing this the next day. I went in again for my internship and to get my laptop back, my regular teacher was there and asked me how was class. I told her the truth and said it was fast but it was enjoyable and also I tried to follow her advice and tried to correct myself as best as I could. I was a little surprised with her answer, she said that it is one of the hardest classes on my level and she was glad I took her advice and did some correcting because that is what she wants to help me with. She also said since I took ballet before I knew most of the steps so she just wants to teach me the proper ways again instead of the actually move. That's why her class is slow and she does more corrections because she hates sloppy ballerinas and I know that would look bad. You should have seen us though we were all over the place with the company members class.

I hope to take it again though but since I have classes it might be a rare thing only if I get a break like this week. I enjoyed even though my ankles are in so much pain. If you would ask me if I would do it again I probably would. I am getting used this ballet thing and I think I will stick with it for a while. I'll still be doing my update on Saturday. It's going to be weird though because I am still a little sore and I usually wait a week in between my classes so my pains end up going away. We'll see what will happen than I guess.
xo
Jackie

Stretches I Do at Home

I got home early today because it is University week on campus and since there is so much going on we got to go home early. Also we don't have to go in tomorrow or the next day because of a huge celebration. I'm too lazy to go to it so I am going to go get some hours at my internship so I can finish and yet I don't want to finish it just yet.

So, since I was early I decided to do some stretches! I put on some music in my room and started doing some simple tendus and to start off with. I also did some releves, I keep my feet parallel then I lift my feet to demi pointe (in relevé position). I repeat this several times until I get tired or my feet cramps up.  I hear this helps your calf muscles, tendons and ligaments which will get all stretched out so they are ready. I've also notice that the releves help improve my balance so that is what I am struggling with. I did that for about 15 minutes. I don't do anything to extreme at home yet but maybe later on I will.

Next I just sat in a side split while I was messing browsing blogs and my instagram feed. I am trying to improve my spits and since learning that stretch in class I'm trying to get as much practice and more stretchable.

After that I just got a chair and started doing some feet exercises. I do these because I was on a blog that recommended them to strength your foot for pointe and I am trying my best to make them ready so I can get there faster. First I get a small ping pong ball and then I pick it up a few times. This helps strengthen your toes, your arches, and your ankles joints. I usually do it while on the computer.

Another one I do is when I am just sitting around the house.I usually just draw the alphabet with my foot while its pointed. I do it in cursive and then regular. I sometimes do numbers but my ankles hurt after I do all 26 letters so I usually switch feet. I do this when ever and what's great is I can do it sitting or standing. I sometimes do this during class and I feel like I get strange looks.

The last thing I did was do some choreography work. I am trying to do a tap routine and it is doing good. I just started messing with some steps and all of sudden I was making a dance. It is so cool. I wasn't planning on doing this but it turned out great and plus it is one of my dance goals to start doing more tap stuff.

If anyone has any ballet barre routines they recommend from youtube please let me know. I am trying to see if I could build a PVC ballet barre at my place and once I get that done I can do some routines whenever I have some time off from classes.It is another goal I am trying to set which is practicing at home. Also how do you stretch at home. I only do basic stuff so I would like to know what you do.

Hope you found this helpful! I also might be taking a ballet class tomorrow since I have no college class! It's late though, the class starts at 7 and ends at 8 but I think I might do it since I have no class the next day too. And an extra day of dance is good, right?

*weheartit

xo
Jackie

Dance Diary | 4th Week of Ballet

The picture was taken after class at the main theater. I wanted a little pictorial session so I got my aunt to take a few pictures. She is not that handy with my Iphone so they didn't turn out that good but I saved a few of them. Next time I will bring my good camera and hope to get better shots of my dance outfit!

I've been counting down to ballet class all this week just because of my new stuff! I usually have been counting down to Saturday's because they are a highlight to my week but this week's was most anticipated for some reason. Partly I was excited for wearing my new dance gear but another reason was I have been practicing at home to help me a little more and to get me more flexible and such.

Class began as normal. I realized if I get in the room as soon as the other batch of dancers get out I have more time to fix my ballet shoes and get them comfortable instead of trying to redo them during class. My teacher likes to start right away so I don't have much time to prepare.

This week we did barre as usual but my teacher was very focused on making us find our center and sucking our belly buttons into our spines. I know weird and crazy! She kept on say it over and over 'till we got it. I tried my hardest to get my big stomach in as hard as I could. I wasn't really breathing through the routine because I was so focused on holding in all that I got to be tall and stretched up as possible. It was kind of hard because I can hardly keep myself up and to suck everything in was definitely a challenge.

Next she tried to make us do different barre routines than our normal ones. I am still having trouble remembering the names and what they actually do. I forgot the names but I know how to do the move. Sometimes it frustrates me because my mind is trying to remember, my stomach is being tortured to stay in and all at the same time I am tying to keep my balance and do everything. I am beginning to struggle and I know my teacher sees that and has been pointing it out more. I really am trying but some times it is frustrating. I am not as sad I was in my previous week but I am just annoyed at how I cannot do anything all at the same time plus I just started again and yet I want everything to be more difficult. I don't know if it is because it is too beginner for me or too fast paced for me to pick up on.

Throughout the class I was always called upon to point my toes. How can I point my toes when I have 50 things running in my head to get everything perfect? I do not know how I did this before. The teacher always said perfect ballerinas have beautiful feet. No they don't because they are in shoes that help them and do not look at your feet when you don;t have shoes on because they are probably not perfect as she says. It just frustrates me that I have so many things I am trying to work on and she is calling all these demands making me confused.

Another thing we did was stretches for splits. I got my splits done before but quitting and not doing anything athletic for 5 years makes you lose that flexibility. Doing those exercises made me hurt badly. I can not do what they were doing and I felt like my knee was going to give out from holding up so much weight. I did try but I could hardly take it. When we did the other side I could almost do the split but it hurt so bad and I couldn't go down anymore. We finally stretched it out and I was so realized to stand up because I can not handle it. I hope to get flexible again. Her goal for us is to get down in front splits by December but I don't think I could do it.

One thing we did different this week beside the stretching was across the room. We haven't did that since we started and I was wondering if we ever would. I would always like that back then and now it seems like not so much. We did a coupe tendu which was different from what I remember. Before I never started in B plus attitude and then the move but that is how she taught it. At first none of us got it and we looked so bad but as we kept doing it we got better.

Finally when we got to the center part of class, we put all our time into across the room which I liked instead f center. I don't really like center all that much so when we only had to do a short routine I was glad. We did a move that I used to love but I forgot the name I even forgot it in class until she demonstrated it. The only good thing about that class was I was doing good with that move and looked graceful. U also liked the way my skirt swayed and moved with that move. I must remember its name next time. After that class was pretty much over.

So I'm sorry this post sounded like a mini rant. I dint mean it to but my teacher can be a little perfect and a little strict when it comes to these things. I hope again next week;s will be better and that I can get more practice and get more a hang of everything. Hope you enjoyed this post and again 'till next week.

xo 

Jackie

Another Dance Haul

I wasn't really content with what I had so I went out and bought more! I knew I would because I needed some basics to last me since I am trying to start ballet semi-full time. So when pay day came around I marched straight to the mall that held the local Capezio store and just bought whatever I thought I needed. The lady there is so friendly and knows me personally now so you can tell I go there a lot.

Leotard | Capezio Size 22
I got a basic short sleeve leotard cause this is what I find to be most comfortable for me. When I tried it on the material was nice and not silky like ones I had before. And I was kind of surprised it had a built in bra support thing. I think I was surprised because all my leotards I was wearing was for children and I finally got an adult one. I feel so grown up and I a little proud I can still wear my childhood leotards but this one obviously fits me way better and I hope to dance better in it.
leotard

Wrap Skirt | Capezio Wrap Skirt Size XL
I was so happy I got a dance skirt. I had always wanted one because when I was doing ballet before I wasn't allowed to wear one because our teacher said they weren't showing our hips which we needed to work on. I have been staring at this skirt since I got it and it makes me feel so pretty. I like that it isn't too short on me and that is what I was afraid of. I like the material but when I tried to take pictures of it the material is so see through it reflects weird. I can't wait for Saturday so I could test this skirt out!
skirt

Tights | Danskin Pink Size D
You can't have enough tights can you? I needed more tights because I didn't want to be washing my pair every week and wear it out quickly. I really wanted convertible ones but they were so expensive and I thought instead of spending the extra money I could do it myself and save and since the price was very high compared to the ones I buy I think I would have saved but maybe later I would invest in a pair or two.
tights

So that is what I bought! I hope to get some more things later because I am becoming obsessed with dance wear again. I can't wait to use my new stuff at my upcoming ballet class!

xo 

Jackie

Dance Essentials I Recommend For Starting Again

Since I started ballet again, I wanted to help out those who need advice on what they should wear/have during dance class. These are just my suggestions and what I think about them. I used some of these myself so if you need a personal opinion, here you go!

A Comfortable Leotard |
Of course, the basic leotard is an essential in ballet. One that I recommend for beginners are ones that are comfortable and that are not to revealing. I know if you are a beginner it is scary to show your body especially like me. I wore so many layers that it isn't funny. I recommend a short sleeve leotard that is very basic. I don't think you should go with open backs or criss-cross just yet unless you are okay and comfortable with showing your body. It took me a while when I was in my teens to transfer over and now that I put on some weight I am glad I still have my basic leotards with me.




Tights |
I have had Danskin tights since I started dance. My mom loves the tights and swears by them. I still have the tights and they are in perfect condition. I really love them and they are very comfortable to wear. I love that they are not too pink or not too white and are just the right ballet pink for me. Getting tights you like is very important because you should know if they breathe right and even fit to your liking. 

Wrap Skirt |
Actually any type of short skirt will do. I love these because they cover just right on me and I like that they aren't too long or too short to be so revealing even in a leotard. I choose black because it is basic but if you are required a color than follow that. And make sure if you could wear a skirt in class because some studios might have a dress code. Luckily, mine doesn't have a strict one so I can wear mostly any accessory I want.





Ballet Shoes |
A must in ballet class. I had so many pairs of ballet shoes that I don't know where to store all of them. Finding the right one is going to make your feet extra happy. Remember that ballet shoes might be smaller than your actual size or sometimes bigger than your actual street shoe size. I have pairs that were 2x too small that my street shoes and then the recent pair I bought is 2 sizes smaller than my actual street size. It just depends on the brand I guess. Also make sure you buy the shoe so you can test it in the store. I know I have had my mom get my shoes when I was around 13-14 years old and we ended up getting mad at each other since the shoes never fit me just right. I learned after that to always do it myself or have both of us go.  Just remember that it is your feet and they should be comfortable.

Hope you like and I hope anyone else can suggest something for starting dance!

xo
Jackie

Dance Diary | 3rd Week of Ballet

I did better this week! I still feel like I could do better but I wasn't so disappointed or sad when I got home. So class this week started out the same as the previous weeks. We did the same barre excersizes and added a few new moves. I forgot though how much grand plies hurt. We did more of those and my thighs were screaming by the time we were done.

This week we did focous on more strecting and trying to get our muscles flexible instead of working on technique. I'm glad because I lost my flexibility after quiting for 5 years and I have got the basic moves down so getting strected out is better for me. We did stecthes for arabeque and other leg streches to really get loose. We did some barre stretches and then some floor stretches to really get it going and make ourselves more looser than we are. I discovered I have some tension and doing this made me more looser and calmer.

We also did some jumps in the center and since we were not doing it seriously we had fun with it and I didn't notice how bad I was at landing. It was quite fun jumping and not just doing the ballet moves but to actually just let go of the stress. My teacher thought it would be fun to end the class with some jumps and to loosen our muscles from the workout we just did.

After the class I did have to wear my leg warmers because it was cold and raining out and I knew that would be so bad for my now stretched out muscles. It did feel nice and warm and I left them on even though i took my dance clothes off. They seemed to comfy to get out off. But getting home I felt horrible and so sore already and I knew in the morning I would feel so bad and it did happen. I woke up with sore muscles especially my thighs and shoulders. I was expecting this the first day after ballet but this is the third week and I am now just sore. I guess it was going to come sooner or later. I did follow on and stretch so I could be more flexible.

I might have a conflict with school! I might need to go to a class on Saturda because the professors are changing the schudule around and I might miss dance because of it. I am trying to reason with them because I am working for the ballet school also and I'm not just dancing for the company. I hope this gets sorted because I am paying a lot of money for this and I intend on not quitting ballet.

I guess this week was okay and I am looking forward to next weeks as always!

xo 

Jackie

Goals I'd Like to Accomplish in Dance!

What do I want to accomplish in dance this year? I just wanted to procrastinate from an essay I am supposed to do and just write a blog post instead. I have been thinking about this and from my last dance diary I really need to make a few small goals I could accomplish to lift my spirits.

I listed some goals in my head that I wanted to achieve this dance year while waiting for my ballet class to start. It got me thinking and I think it would be good if I set up a few goals that can help me reach my dream of being a pointe dancer.  My dance year is from June to March so I technically just started.

Besides going en pointe I have some other things I want to do. I know I might have to wait a little longer to go en pointe so this is what I want to focus on so I can get there faster.

1. Do a pirouette perfectly again!

 I used to do them perfectly and I still can a little but I lost my balance and flexibility. I wish I could try and see if I could find my perfect pirouette again. 

2. Chroegraph a Tap routine.

I am far from being a perfect ballerina and I knew that way back then. My forte was tap and I was a little better at it than ballet. I just want to chreograph a whole tap number and be proud of it. I kind of want to teach at the dance company I work with and I need to get my tap routines going. 

3.Practice my technique.

I have a lot of work to do so I should get to practicing. 

4. Form a better arch.

I was told I had "Flinstone Feet" and then I was told I had good arches. I just want to improve my arch and mold it so I could have better feet. I know it will make me feel better if I had dancer feet but I can only try and to improve the ones I already have.

5. Just be a better dancer all around!

I just want to work on being a good dancer. I might not get to prima ballerina but I want to reach ballerina according to my definition of it. I just want to see myself progress and mold into something I would have never dreamed of and especially more graceful.

Do you have any dance goals you really want to achieve? I know I want to focus on these and then add more and see how far I get. I really wish I could do dance permanently again but for now I have to finish school and then have the possibilities be endless.

*weheartit

xo 

Jackie

Dance Diary | 2nd Week of Ballet

I'm back again for another dance diary update! I haven't posted much this week because this week was my first week back to college. I am now a senior and will be graduating college in less than 9 months! I am so excited about that so I can work for my country's top ballet company permentently!

Enough about that then! I worked at the company in the morning and did the stuff I always did so that was pretty much boring.

As for class. I hate to admit this but I want to be honest and say I think I did horrible this week. I mean it wasn't too advance or anything but I just seemed out of it. Last week I felt so confident and ready to be a ballerina again and now I just fell flat on my face, not literally because that would be bad and embarrassing, I just feel like I didn't do my best.

I kept forgetting about my arms when I was concentrating so hard to keep my feet straight and try to pointe my feet perfectly. I would get corrected so many times. The teacher would say, "Jackie, remember arms," and I would fix them and then I forgot to turn out my feet and she would say. "Jackie, those feet are not turned out." I felt like I was a mess.

After the barre I thought I would do better but the teacher had to ntroduce jumps and I wasnt to ready for that. I mean I am overweight as it is and when I jump and try to land gracefully I make a huge thump and would be embarrsed because I am the biggest one there. I tried to do the steps but I couldn't stop hearing that thump I made and the way my thighs clapped together. I know I shouldn't be ashamed because I am there to lose weight and that was my goal to be a ballerina again.

For me, I think one of my biggest problem that day was I was so happy from last week I let my confidence go and wasn't that determined. I was also worrying about my leotard and my shorts were bunching up on me. Lesson learned that I need a new leotard and a ballet skirt or something I feel confident in. My ballet shoes were a little off that session too and I had to readjust them several times. I should make sure they fit better for next week. 

I can't let this class day let me down or else I know I won't go back and I know I can easily convince myself to do something or not do it. I should take my own advice and just suck it up. There will be better days and I might have another worse one but I cannot let that stop me. I wish I could of said this to myself when I was in class but I was so focused on trying to remember everything and just do better.

Did anyone feel this when they had a bad day at dance. My teacher didn't say anything bad but I am beating myself up over nothing. I hope next week I am better and really go in there with a smile and be as confident as possible. This is why I put off writing this blog post. Now that I have I feel better and I know I can do better and improve for next week.

Also that is a picture of me! I thought I would take one and look at it and say I am a ballerina again. I need to work on it more but looking at that picture just makes me happy seeing I can improve and do better.

xo

Jackie

Dance Diary | My First Class!

I did it! I actually did it! I took my first dance class again after 5 years!

I am over the moon right now and just so happy. I cannot believe I did it though.

So the night before I couldn't really sleep and I knew that was bad for me because for one I had to get up early to head to the dance company for my internship and two because the class was at 3 in the afternoon and that would be the time I start losing it and feel the most tired. But I did get a good night sleep in the end and woke up refreshed. When I did get up fully I started having a stomach ache and I have no idea why. I didnt eat or drink coffee and just left after I got everything together.

If you didnt know I work for a ballet company. I am an intern there and that inspired me to get back into dance and most importantly ballet. So when I got there I went up to my best friend who is also the registrar of the dance school. She was the first friend I made there. I enrolled myself and she was so happy for me because I finally did after all these months I've been complaining to her that I miss it. SHe was the one who really convinced me and I really thank her for it. After I got all signed up, I had to work with her in the dance shop. SInce it was the 2nd week of the new dance school year a lot of moms were buying their daughters leotards and tights. I handled that 'till about 12:30 until I went for lunch.

I was counting down the hours 'till class and I kept asking Jacque (we have the same name which is so funny and cool) questions about the class and was helping her enroll more students. I kept listening in to see if any of my classmates were going to be coming to the front desk but there was no luck. I kept busy until 2:30 and tried to keep my mind on maintaing the dance shop.

When it was time for me to get dressed I got to use the artistic director's dressing room because I was an empolyee there which was great because I didn't have to travel 2 flights of stairs to get to a changing room. Once I put everything on I remembered how hard it was to put tights on and to get it to fit perfectly and how you want it on your body. After I got that done I was all dressed and I felt amazing to be dressed as a ballerina again. Words cannot describe how good and confident I felt when I was dressed like that.

When it was time for class that is when my nervousness and fear came back. I didn't feel ready and felt so shy and scared unlike my previous happy state I was a few minutes ago. Jacque talked me through it pushed me but the public relation guy came down and requested me to plan an event for the upcoming production the company was having. I was glad that Jacque told him I had class and I would do it next Saturday or email him the details during the week. I was also glad he wasn't mad and encouraged me to do it.

I knew the teacher because I have been working there for a couple of months. The worst part was that she was the school principal of the whole dance school and was very strict. I was even more nervous when I found out she was going to be teaching the class permenently. I sucked it up though and hugged Jacque for good luck.

I put on my ballet shoes and took deep breaths. We warmed up for about 5 minutes because we are now advised to be warmed up and limber before her class which will be hard for me since I don't have much time before the class because I am working there also. Next time though I am definitely taking the hour off to get ready and warmed up.

We did most things at the barre which was good because I always liked the barre routines. When she taught the steps I was glad I got them right away. I really thought I was going to do terriable and I prepared myself for it but I shouldn't really think negatively like I do cause it turned out fine. I did have a hard time with my ankle a couple times but it didn't bother me much when I started to move it more.

The proudest thing though was I didn't get many corrections to straighten out my foot or anything. I really thought I would be the one always getting yelled at for doing something wrong but it was the girl in front of me. I also got complmented of my turnout and I have good arches. I was told when I was going to start pointe at 11 that I had "Flinstone Feet" and I could never go en pointe. I was probably too young and my arches weren't formed that well yet. If the teacher had told me I was too young then I would have understood. But when our teacher said that I had pretty good arches that made me so excited that maybe one day I could reach my dream and go en pointe.

The class was pretty simple and I actually enjoyed being back. I know they say don't worry and it will be fine in the end and I can say it is true. It was a good hour workout and I was surprised I wasn't out of breath so easily. I actually did it and wasnt a bag full of sweat. I was sweaty but I was worried I would just be pouring buckets but I didnt and I was so glad. It is a good workout for me and I'll continue.

After class I headed back to the office with the teacher and she asked if I was going to continue and I said yes. I am sticking with this no matter what. Once in the office the staff were asking if I took a class and I nodded and it felt good saying that I took a class and was back to dancing. 

So overall my class was good and I am glad to be back. I know why I quit a few years back because it is so displined and strict but since I have background I know I won't quit so easily anymore. I am going to stick through this and I will get to my dream of going en pointe and becoming a ballerina again.

I hope you enjoyed my story of my first ballet class. Also please tell me if you were nervous to like I was so I don't feel like such a loser for being so worried. I'll update about my class again next week. 

xo 

Jackie

Dance Haul

I needed to pick up some stuff so I can start dancing again so I went to the mall and decided just to get some stuff that will last me for a couple of months. Doing this really inspired me to get back into dance and is making me so excited as I look at everything. It's like it is finally real and I can begin ballet again.

Ballet Shoes | So Dance
These are the only ones that fit! (enter sad face here) The dance store I went to didn't have much stock so I had to get these ones. They are pretty tight too which is kind of bad but I had to get them for now and order another pair later. I never had a ballet slipper like this so I am curious to try it out. It is actually a size 9 and I am a size 11 but they stretch and fit my foot. The only problem I might have is the elastic is kind of tight so I might have to replace those soon.

Tights | Danskin & Body Wrappers
I cannot find my tights anywhere so I decided to just pick up more. I mean you can't have too many tights because you are always in them and you are strecthing them out all the time. I got a brown one and 2 pinks because I miss wearing the browns ones when I did tap and I am trying to do some tap in my spare time so these will be perfect. I always used Danskin since I started dance so you can say I got used to the color and fit of these pink ones. Mine never ripped or got runs but they did get loser which is normal but if I could find my old pairs in the million of boxes I have they would still probably be good.

Leg Warmers | Capezio
I never had legwarmers because I didnt have a need for them and another reason was because my mom hated them and wouldn't let me get them but now that I am older and paid for it with my own money then she can't stop me. I love the pink and they are nice and thick which I wanted. I really want to pick up ones that have the hole for the pointe shoes next.

Hair Donut | Claire's
I didnt mean to get one but I did and I am glad I did because it works around the house too. I have long curly and hard to manage hair so I can never make a perfect bun and when I was little my mom would make such an ugly bun on me that it just looked weird. With this hair donut I have kind of got a perfect bun but I still need to practice.

Bobby Pins | Dollar Store
A must to keep that perfect ballet bun in place. If I lived with my boyfriend, I know he would hate seeing them around the apartment and plus there is 200 pieces so that is alot and I bet I could lose all of them in less than a week.I hope I can keep an eye out on these because it would be a pain to buy more.

That is what I bought. I didn't get a leotard cause I had one but I might get a spare later on since I have only 1 good one and another one that is too fancy for class. I hope you enjoy my recent dance goodies. I really wanted splurge since I started again and it makes me feel good.

Also tomorrow is the day! I have counted down and finally the day of my first ballet class has come. I hope I can sleep tonight but I have a feeling I might not get much. I am just so anxious and nervous and just so many emotions are running through my mind. I will definietely tell you tomorrow about what happens

xo

Jackie